I Think I Need To Break Up With My TV Boyfriend

I have four stories and/or columns due to the paper this week. I filed one this morning, and now I have to start on the next one, so you know what that means? Yes! Procrastination!

Hey, it's not my fault that iVillage is constantly e-mailing me totally awesome quizzes to take. Today it was: "Who's Your TV Boyfriend?"

I answered the questions, things like: "Does your ideal guy drink: beer, fine wine, whisky or hypnotiq." Hmmm, I couldn't help but notice the lack of non-alcoholic choices, so I'm thinking maybe my dreamy dude might have a little, you know, problem? So we may be looking at some rehab or at the very least some Al-Anon meetings for me in the future.

Further down the list "It's most important that your TV dream dude: "Gets You, Lusts after you, makes you feel safe, cracks you up." Duh! My dream guy would do all of the above. I think he will also have to come with his own cape. This may explain why it's so hard to find dates.

So after spending ten minutes or so taking the quiz I ended up being paired with someone I never would have considered - McDreamy himself, Dr. Derek Sheperd. I don't know, I so don't see that happening. Hey, I'm sure he doesn't either. It just seems so cliche, every woman seems to think he's dreamy. Me? Not so much.

Thinking I really didn't want to write about preparing kids for college just yet, I decided to take the quiz one more time - changing my answers to see who I'd get. This time it was a lot more in the right direction with Jim Halpert, (John Krasinski) from "The Office." He'd be a great pick if I could ever get past the reality that he's a year younger than my oldest son. Yeah, I'm so not Demi Moore in that area. Or any other one I can think of. That said, I have still, what could be considered an inappropriate crush on Lloyd Dobler. ("Say Anything"). In many ways, Lloyd has spoiled me for any other guy. Overly verbal, intense, funny and painfully emotional, if he wasn't forever 19-years-old he'd be perfect.

So apparently it's back to work for me. Unless of course a new quiz finds its way into my inbox. I always meet my deadlines, but it's sometimes a curvy road to that destination.