A rose by any other name...
The other day I was sitting at my desk and suddenly became aware of this sickly sweet smell. I could not for the life of me figure out where it was coming from. Like a dog with something stuck to my tail, I stood up, turned in circles and assumed I'd find some stinky perfume ad from a magazine stuck under my seat (chair that is). Nothing. I sat down, tried to work, but the wafting scent kept distracting me. Finally, I figured out what it was - it was me!
See, when I went to the supermarket and bought some new deodorant, they were out of my usual Secret Regular scent and I had to buy Powder Fresh. It sounded innocuous enough. Ended up Powder Fresh is code for really stinky. So now until I get to the store I am stuck smelling like a fruit basket laced with cheap perfume. The problem is there are so many choices, and they all look the same, so I assume they're all sort of the same. Ends up, not so much.
This life-impacting problem led to a scintillating conversation with my brother/writing partner about mistakes we've made in purchasing personal products. Yes, we are just that close. And no, he's not gay, he just seems that way.
He told me about his recent purchase of some Arm and Hammer toothpaste which leaves a slick silicone-like coating on his tongue, and has a grit that feels like sand, he hates it. But since we were raised by a single mom who takes frugal to a new level, he says he'll use it till it's gone. Come on Mark, you're worth $2.89 - throw it away! I dare you!
When I was telling him about my not-so-Secret scent problem he said I should get the mineral salt type he uses. I explained to him that I went down that road one time with horrible results. Try rubbing a salt stick on a just-shaved arm pit - the expression, "Salt on an open wound" is derived, I think from a woman who actually (and inexplicably) put salt on her freshly shaved arm pit. Painful barely begins to describe the sensation, and the red rash left behind was oh-so charming. So, I will stick to the brand names, stinky or not.
I have a bathroom counter littered with hair products I just had to have because they would make my hair bouncier, shinier, softer and more blond. It is a good thing there is no
Sephora on Cape Cod because I would have to add on to my bathroom for all the products I would buy. And I would just want to hang around there because it's so pretty. But the problem is, half the time I don't end up liking what I bought. Like the hair paste, or cement, or whatever the hell it is that I bought a few years ago (that's still on the counter) to give my hair that edgy, choppy Meg Ryan look. I just looked in need of a good shampoo.
I am a total beauty product slut and I know it. I am not quite as obsessed as my daughter, (her collection of hair conditioners alone is impressive, as is her hair) but I do my share of supporting the billion dollar beauty business. I don't feel bad about it though, I am admittedly a girly girl, but I am going to try to do better in purchasing things I actually use. At least until something sparkly and pretty catches my eye, then all bets are off.
1 comment:
Nice, but I tend toward the more earthy scents: 'Wet Labrador', 'Low Tide', 'Marsh Musk', and the ever popular 'Lowell Sunset'.
And as for salt on the freshly mowed armpits... Yikes! Think habanero burrito kisses on unsuspecting lips. Hate when that happens.
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