Once again we're getting to see a pained looking woman standing next to her politician husband, Governor Elliot Spitzer, while he admits how he not only betrayed the people of New York, but deeply hurt the person he was supposed to love more than anyone.
We saw it with Hillary when she declared she was not, "Tammy Wynette standing by my man." We saw it with New jersey governor James McCreevey as his wife stood there while he announced to the world he was gay. Oh wait, not just gay, a gay AMERICAN. What does that mean? I don't go around declaring myself a straight American, I just found it odd. Maybe he hoped glomming on to some sense of patriotism would save his ass in a post 9/11 era.
I've wondered what I would do in that situation, and I don't know. It's easy to sit back and say you'd never stand there with cameras rolling while you're subjected to the humiliation, but if you've got kids and a life it's hard to say. I have thought about what I'd LIKE to do in a situation like that, but who knows what the reality would bring forth.
As I watched Silda Spitzer standing next to her prostitute-frequenting husband I wondered what was going through her head. Betrayal within a marriage is tough enough, but on a public stage it has to be overwhelming. I cannot begin to imagine what it would be like to find out your spouse has been frequenting high-priced hookers, though it might explain why he asked you to turn down the heat and start buying generic ketchup.
I find it interesting that McCreevey's ex-wife, Dina Matos has become the poster-girl for wronged political wives. She was trotted out yesterday talking about why women don't just walk away, or, mid-press conference scream out, "You mother f*&%er, how could you do this?!" That is MY fantasy of what I would do.
I have never heard an answer to the question of why women stand there that satisfies me. I think it's pressure from aides, the husband spinning out of control, a sense of duty and shock. After spending years being the woman behind the man you're probably very well-schooled in what your role is.
This is why I would never become a political spouse. Not because of a fear of my mate frequenting hookers or coming out of the closet, but because I have way too many of my own thoughts and opinions to ever take a back seat to anyone. I would be a politician's nightmare. I'm probably many a person's nightmare, but that's a whole other post. And lots of therapy sessions.
"I am deeply sorry I did not live up to what was expected," he said today during his resignation.
Wow, talk about an understatement.
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