Saturday, April 26, 2008

Apparently Chivalry Is Not Dead - At Least in England

I was reading a post on one of my favorite blogs, Jezebel the other day, and came across a study that was done by a British online dating site, Dating Direct, about chivalry.

It seems that 56% of the guys surveyed said they enjoy picking up the tab for dinner, and 34% said they have defended a woman's honor.

I am probably going to incur the wrath of every feminist out there when I say, I kind of like that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I can take care of myself, but you know, I don't always want to. There, I said it: Being able to do it all doesn't mean you want to always have to do it all.

I love the idea of a guy noticing the air in my tires is low, his offering to lift something heavy, and telling me after as long day, why don't I put my feet up and he'll make me some tea.

Is this chivalry, or it is just being kind to the person you love? I might not do those exact things for a guy - unless a tire is flat I can't tell what it's up to, I can help lift heavy things, but I'm no Incredible Hulk. But I would make tea, cookies and even a lasagna if so desired.

To my way of thinking there's a big difference between chivalry and sexism. Someone wanting to look out for you does not take away your power or your independence- it makes you feel cared for and appreciated.

All right, so maybe I've watched a few too many movies with princesses, but I've also watched my fair share of Katharine Hepburn films, and I know women are strong, powerful and capable. I also think it's all right to be vulnerable.

There's a line in the movie "27 Dresses" where James Marsden's Kevin says to Katherine Heigl, "I think you deserve more than what you settle for. I think you deserve to be taken care of for a change."

Wanting to be taken care of a little bit doesn't take away any of your super powers, especially if it's by someone you want to take care of right back.

So, I will cherish having doors opened for me, my hand being taken to help me out of a car, and a jacket being put around my shoulders because I look chilly.

It doesn't mean I can't be a best-selling author or anything else I want to be, it just means I am well loved, and there's nothing wrong with that.

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